A lesson from Dad

I signed into Facebook yesterday and saw this video on my dad's page for his recent mission trip to Panama:


I sat there and cried like a baby.
The beginning Bible verse, Philippians 2:3-4 (I added verse 4):

"3 Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit, but in humility consider others better than yourselves.

4 Each of you should look not only to your own interests, but also to the interests of others," is just awesome.

After reading that and watching the video I just sat at my desk and cried. I cried for many reasons. One being that this is the heart of what my faith means to me. I have had conversations, and read many places, and heard many people on the radio; make fun of Christians for being people that are weak. They say we are weak because we are willing to just take it (turn the other cheek), we are weak because we are people pleasers willing to give anything to anyone; we are weak because we are "followers" instead of leaders.

I wept for those misguided individuals. To them I say, “Would a weak person be able to get over themselves and see that the true value of your possessions is being able to not let those possessions own you.” To be able to give your hard earned money away to help another person, to give up your comforts and go to another continent and work for free, and to do it in a hard time, as my father has, is not weak. It is a strength those misguided people will never know. It is a strength that can only come from being strong enough to surrender yourself to God and listen to His plan. One will never understand what that means fully until they have let themselves actually listen to God and not their own selfish motives.

Being able to turn the other cheek is not weakness either. It is something many people cannot do, therefore they cannot understand it. Being able to forgive is a true gift. Instead of spending your life harboring anger, you can truly let it go and live in peace, which is a bigger gift then winning the lottery if you ask me. Even though people wrong you, maybe they did not set out to do that one thing to you, but in their selfishness they harmed you.

For instance, I have been trying very hard to be the wife Graham deserves. I do not think I am a bad wife, but this year I feel I have been called to surrender my selfishness. I have been doing this in many ways. First, I have been praying. Second, despite calling myself a Christian for years I have never actually read the Bible from cover to cover... NEVER, so I am reading it this year using this Bible.

See, I struggled with what I believed and when I moved out of my parent’s house I just shelved it, putting school and daily life ahead of figuring out what I really believed. Graham has challenged me to figure that out. He has done that by asking questions I did not have answers to and sharing his opinion. In the discussions we would have I would do my best to explain Christianity, but always ended by challenging him to read the Bible for himself and determine what he thought. So he bought the 1 year Bible to read, which further challenged me, in a silent way, to actually read it...... so here I am, reading the Bible after 20 years of God in my life.

I had been feeling myself being very angry inside, so I had started praying that God would help take that away. I felt I had been being very snappy with Graham, and others, when it was not necessary. I mean, he would clean the house and put things away and I would get angry....... ummmmm hello ladies, would any of you get angry if your awesome husband helped clean?????? In praying that prayer I feel like that was the opening God needed for me to see that Bible that had been on the end table for a year, that I was conveniently overlooking.

I have been reading it and have seen so far that the Old Testament is not my favorite to read through, but I find it fascinating because of all the laws they had back then. I have also learned that for me, the key to stop being angry has been to follow God's directions right there on those pages. I have learned that I need to LISTEN to my husband. Not what he is saying verbally, but what he is means when he does things as well.

Now back to that turn the other cheek part of this. You'll remember above I was saying that maybe someone wronged you, but it was not intentionally done to you..... here is what I meant. Graham may have moved my pile of important documents somewhere else, but he was not doing that to me, he was trying to help me. Instead of viewing things people do as being done TO ME, but seeing it as a consequence of an action (positive or negative) is really helping my anger. When I am in traffic I do not assume the person who just cut me off was doing that to me, rather maybe he really had to get over and the consequence was cutting me off. It makes turning the other cheek a little easier. Does this make me a weak person or just an enlightened one?

If some one asks me for help and it is not a convenient time for me to do so, but I do it anyway does that make me a weak people pleaser, or just a good friend? If I say something that I see would have hurt my feelings, and try to smooth it over does that make me weak, or just some one who feels for others? I feel that you get what you give. We have had many instances where we had to rely on strangers to help us last year, and each time those people could have walked on by, but they did not. They had the strength to put themselves aside, stop and help a complete stranger. In the Bible Christians are called to help the lowest of the low when they are in need. I know I am not wording this right, but basically if some one asks for help give it as it is God asking you for help, because he is. He has put this person in front of you for a purpose and whether you can put your selfish desires behind you to help is your choice, but if you do what you receive is far greater then what you had before.

Like my dad, up and leaving for Panama to help others, when he is in a time of need at home as well. I bet it was not perfect timing for him, while in the middle of a job hunt himself, but he went. Now, I have not gotten to ask him about the trip yet, but I bet (after going on a few of these trips myself) that he feels he got more out of that trip then he gave. In my experience, you see that you do have a purpose other than 9-5, and that if you think you have it bad, you are blessed beyond compare. That purpose is to help others in their time of need because you are strong enough to give of yourself, not because you are a weak people pleaser. I only wish more people had these “weaknesses”. I feel these “weak” people are really the leaders, because they are willing to go against the selfish grain.

Dad, if you made it to the end of this long winded post I want you to know that despite the fact that I am 27 (for a few more weeks) and married you are still teaching & inspiring me. You have a HUGE purpose and I am glad to see that you have been able to get out and show that purpose to many others and myself. Thanks for the lesson and reminder.